I’ll admit it: I did not have “the Cubs hit nine home runs against the Brewers” on my September bingo card.

And yet, here we are.

The Cubs absolutely demolished Milwaukee 17-3 on Monday night, and honestly, I’m still trying to figure out what I watched. Nine home runs. Nine. That’s not a baseball game. That’s a home-run derby where somebody forgot to tell the Brewers they were allowed to participate.

Alex Bregman led the insanity with three home runs, because apparently hitting one or two wasn’t dramatic enough. Clay Holmes, meanwhile, quietly tossed six scoreless innings with eight strikeouts while everyone else was busy turning Wrigley into a fireworks show.

And here’s the part that makes me dangerously optimistic: this Cubs offense has been ridiculous.

Chicago hit 62 home runs in August, the most in a month in National League history, and now leads MLB with 196 homers and 742 runs scored.

The Cubs are now 78-60, tied with Philadelphia for the top NL wild-card spot.

That’s just how they do things.

But for one night?

Forget the anxiety.

Nine home runs.

Seventeen runs.

September baseball.

And suddenly its time for the cubs to book their flights to Los Angeles for October.

This is fine.

Everything is completely fine.